is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
i think a pirate just stole the rest of our fucking beer. what an appropriate costume.
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
Who died my cat blue again?
I didn't even know we were hiding from the cops, I was just playing with the cats. People kept telling me to be quiet the cops are here and I was like DID YOU SEE THIS CAT!?
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
I duct taped a bottle of vodka to the back of your closet while you were sleeping in case of emergencies. Go rip it off, it's going to be a long night.
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