he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
hell yes lets make some ravioli
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
My dad is drinking wine out of a measuring cup. This explains so much.
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
You call it a hangover, I call it a baby squirrel burrowing its way out of my head.
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
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