In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
The guy who took my order at mcdonalds asked for my number. I think we should start fucking fast food employees, they're easy and think we're goddesses.
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
I'm crying, drinking alone and applying for jobs tonight. I figure the alcohol will lower my job standards.
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
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