How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
I need a sticker that says "It's no use hitting on me - I'm the plus one" Seriously, how do they think I got in in the 1st place?
I found my crush's facebook page. And his wife's. Apparently they are still in love. Of all the people to have happy marriages! Fuck, I'm depressed.
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
Come over. I have beer, your weird ass vegan pizza, and a raging hard on.
Marry me.
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
Woo is fucking right, dude. Vodka night tonight. Honestly, every night pretty much seeems like vodka night lately. My liver wants to move out of my body like I gave it an eviction notice.
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
Randomize
