Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
OMG I DIDNT READ THAT TEXT CAREFULLY CAUSE I'M ON THE DEVILS LETTUCE & I THREATENED TO PUNCH A CHILD OMG I'M SO SORRY
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
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