She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
At least drunk me was smart enough to stash toilet paper in my bag before I started my walk home. Finally countless squat pees and wiping with grass taught me to be prepared.
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
I just accidentally showed an old lady a pic of my penis while showing her cat pics. So how's your day going?
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
Randomize
