then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
I automatically know you're drunk now as soon as you start yelling in spanish
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
I just tried to text you by typing "whoa" into my contacts.
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
Drunk level: ugly crying in the bar upon discovery of sweet tarts and not smarties.
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
Randomize
