Wish i knew that 10 minutes ago when i told him to dance with my blackberry while i got another drink
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
Randomize
