2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
I woke up to a gnawing sound in the middle of the night and asked him what it was. He told me it was the family of squirrels that lives in the wall and to go back to sleep.
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
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