I need help removing her.
the party we crashed was not a party. the party we crashed was jens grandads funeral.
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
Randomize
