whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
I accidentally sent him a snapchat of my boobs and now we're going on a date tomorrow... Could be worse.
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
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