I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
My mom caught just caught me jerking off...in her room.
If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
I woke up with my 26er down my pants and a peice of paper stuck to my forehead with gum that said "tell it to the greek goddess beside me"
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
Just found out I have to work new year's eve. It's like one final 'fuck you' from 2009.
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
Looked like a bag of smashed assholes and smelt like a brewery - still got morning sex. Marriage rules sometimes!
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
Randomize
