Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
Um of course I blew him. He brought me a shamrock shake. It was two o’clock in the morning on St. Patrick’s Day. There was no smoother move basically. He totally earned that head.
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
And on the way out from Applebee's he tried to take the basket of toothpicks claiming he was using them as a tax write off. Last time I babysit my dad on thirsty Thursday.
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
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