So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
What time are you coming? Can you stop and get mouse traps and trojans?
You have mice?
no why?
That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
I'm upset that MJ died and all but waking up to his face on my HDTV in the middle of the night while half-asleep is pretty much the scariest fucking thing ever.
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
She told me I was lying in front of her toilet for an hour saying "lasers."
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
I smoked then listened to a voicemail from my mom...I ended up yelling at my phone cause she wasn't answering me. Forgot it was a recording.
If I don't get struck by a lightning bolt from God by midnight it will be a Christmas miracle.
don't worry dude i have your phone, text me when youre gonna come get it
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Randomize
