Have you ever seen a 300 pound pregnant lady's boob fall out of her shirt cuz she's not wearing a bra? I have.
i am not allowed to pick the men i sleep with anymore
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
Sorry for all the snapchats, I wanted you to feel like u were in America getting plastered with me
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
Randomize
