why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
he woke me up at 3 am to ask me where my plunger, a towel, and staples were. i'm afraid to go into my bathroom.
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
I think you begin to realize how unfair life really is when you're high and you discover that the new box of fruit by the foot on your shelf is actually empty
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot
The struggle is real.
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
Do you think this 2 hour Amazon delivery thing works on vibrators? Cause that would be clutch
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