So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
i hope you realize that ur overconfidence only gave me one orgasm out of all the times we had sex. that's like a 1% success rate. u might wanna rethink how amazing you are.
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
I dont know whats worse: her telling me she was so drunk i was "almost sexy," the fact that even when theyre shitfaced, im just "almost sexy" to girls, or the fact that i wasnt that offended by it.
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
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