I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
I want to frame my negative pregnancy test.
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
You were leaning against a fire hydrant asking people if they wanted to buy free pocket peanuts from you.
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