I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
It's like that thing with the devil and the angel except one shoulder has orgasms and the other has stuffed crust pizza and depression.
That moment when your fucking in an airport bathroom and forget to lock the door. That poor man...scarred forever...
Dude my doctor just legit got down on her knees and loudly begged me to do my pap smear
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
Sorry my phone died. Obviously four o'clock in the morning is a good time to tell you this.
ok first of all what the fuck
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
Randomize
