Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
Just got a call at work, I have to consent to a random drug and alcohol test by end of business day, if you arranged this it's the best/worst April fools prank ever.
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
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