I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
My vagina just recognized that song.
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
After I finished inserting the catheter he said he thought my name was familiar. Didn't have the nerve to tell him he was my fifth grade teacher.
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
You know your life has gone downhill when someone has to preface your night with "don't get locked in a porta potty"
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
Randomize
