She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
I'd feel bad about being drunk at the Christmas service, except for the fact that I've already had sex in this church, so this is just small change.
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
Autocorrect changes "sex" to "sec". I have been so long without it my phone thinks I made a mistake.
Randomize
