one two three fourrrrnication!
Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
I'm planning our wedding on the computer and our threesome on my phone. At the same time.
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
Randomize
