A little girl and i are having a face making battle in mcdonalds
She started it, but I totally finished it.
You screamed, "I am going to fuck this cheeseburger". They all started laughing until you actually started having sex with the cheeseburger.
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
You tripped over nothing.. everyone stopped what they were doing and stared..you stood up and yelled "you win this time gravity"..then started chugging someone's drink
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
Randomize
