its not stalking. its research.
Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
You smell like stripper and shame
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
We should invent fake asshair for you to wear so you can experience my pain for a day.
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
had a dream that i inhaled my pet bird and started choking. Then I tried smoking from a bong and suddenly I smoked myself inside out. this is what happens when I don't smoke weed. my brain can't function!
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
Randomize
