he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
Randomize
