i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
So, i took all the condoms from his nightstand, not in the crazy ex way, but in the I paid for them way.
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
They tried to convince me I broke Alex's nose. Also they stranded me on the roof.
That's what they get for locking a drunk laxer in Mitch's car.
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
He got in a fight. Then called me drunk to see if he should bail his friends out, or walk through a Taco Bell drive-thru. True love.
So then we ended up at a bar full of navy SEALs and I got one of them to take his shirt off, then I felt him up
I feel like 31-year old me is 21-year old me's hero
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
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