id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
Dude, if that was the MLB player I think it was leaving your bedroom this morning please tell me you got his autograph. It could pay the rent for like six months.
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
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