things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
Mike found the condom wrapper on the washing machine and looked at me and said "Magnum? NICE girl. Get that nut!" then proceeded to puke in a cup
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
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