her vagina looked like bernie madoff
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
Come scavenge bits of tuna out of my chest hair
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
I have to take tonight off from shenanigans. My liver is planning a coup
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
