Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
So drunk last night I reviewed my recent anazon purchase of secret deodorant. Trust me, it was eloquent.
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
He has the fingertips of a God
Randomize
