doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
please take me off your list of people to text when you don't want to drink by yourself.
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
I'd be a gr8 surrogate. I'm gonna love your fetus
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
My yoga ball is now going to be used for actual exercise instead of somewhere to suction cup a dildo
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