How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
your cat followed me a mile away from your house. if it doesn't come back, i'm sorry, but I needed to get laid tonight.
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
Question: anytime during the past week did I drunk dial you and give you full permission to grab my boobs? Cus I know I said it I just don't remember who I said it to...
Randomize
