At least make sure they are 18
Why
Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
What time are you coming? Can you stop and get mouse traps and trojans?
You have mice?
no why?
what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?
So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
I just got turned down by a drunk fat chick. At my own birthday party. God hates me.
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
Randomize
