I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
Mike and I just ate the lobster we found in the toilet
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
If you had asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be right now at 26 years old, I can bet you one million dollars that "tweezing out my nose hairs before I go in to get laser hair removal on my upper lip" would NOT have been the answer
Randomize
