it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
Apparently someone switched my cash for monopoly money after midnight so I couldn't get any more drinks at the bar
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
Guess who won a bet and gets to name it Optimus prime if it's a boy
Nevermind. Totally worth it.
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
So this is completely apropos of nothing, but I have a feeling that a friend of mine might be a good match for you. Can I set you two up on a date? Oh, and it seems that we live a block away from each other and aren't having sexy times. This is ridiculous. By the way, there's a chance that I might be a tad drunk. Still though, there's a very *good* chance that you and Mr. X would get along.
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
Randomize
