Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
I should start wearing my Batman shirt more often when I drink. Good things happen. All sorts of shit.
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
The cat is stealing cigarettes and my vagina cures blindness. How's your night?
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