1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
my drunken justification for peeing in her closet was that her shoes were ugly
I woke him up with a blow job and he started sing "oh the USAAAA. IT'S GOING TO BE S BEAUTIFUL DAYYYYY"
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
Did I, at any point last night, say I was dying?
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
The number of threesomes I have agreed to seems to increase every time I talk to you drunk...
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
I yelled at your uterus for you.
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
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