I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?
she's just sitting here eating cilantro out of my herb garden and watching some show about ducks on tv and laughing, what the fuck did you give her?
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
Randomize
