One girl and one boy is just not enough.
that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
i flashed his best friends last night
you always were good at making good first impressions
Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
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