Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
Best feeling in the world? holding your pee all day for a negative preggo test
i don't want a singing card. it disturbs my hangover. give me a pack of cigs taped to a bottle of wine and fuck me without a condom. happy vday baby.
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
Year anniversary in a month. Think I'll just give him a COME ON MY FACE FREE card. I'm both broke and shameless.
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
Randomize
