I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
Life is my bitch right now. The bouncers tried to carry me out of the club, but everyone thought I was crowd surfing so everyone carried me BACK IN. Winning as fuck.
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
I lost a bet last night, now I have to name the baby Fetty Wap, regardless of gender. Riley is going to kill me.
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
Well I told him I’ve got the flu....he said he’d wear a condom
Randomize
