How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Randomize
