quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
went to the bathroom to piss, saw puke in the toilet thought wtf i dont remember puking, then turned around to find a chick i've never seen before passed out in my shower.
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
Your roommates boyfriend just approached me while I was working to tell me about the staph infection he got on his face. Where do you find these people?
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
Just got escorted to my 7:45 class by an old woman because I was too hungover to not realize I was four floors too high.
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
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