You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
Dignity is for republicans.
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
I fell down the stairs while taking the dog out last night. I was laying there with the dog licking me face and my neighbor just stepped over me
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
Randomize
