oh god the rape fog is back!
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
TONIGHT IS GOING TO BE A FUCKING BLAST. EVEN IF I HAVE TO SET OFF A BUNCH OF FIREWORKS IN YOUR KITCHEN.
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
My favorite part of you downing a fifth of fireball in my apartment by yourself is the shot glass in the sink. It's like you attempted moderation and were just like "Fuck this."
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
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