Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
Apple should advertise that their phones are puke-proof. They would appeal to a whole new audience.
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
Randomize
