She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
I've really got to stop smuggling half full bottles of beer out of bars in my purse.
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
Not much. Some creepy guy on Grindr thinks he knows who I am and where I live. So I sent him to that place with jockstraps and bacon. Hope he has fun.
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
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