i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
Do vagina's smell?
I told my boyfriend my favorite food was strawberry poptarts, now my email inbox is getting spammed with nude pics of him with his dick in a poptart box..
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
Uhm... Found a ziploc bag... In the freezer. Sam, thought it was lemonade. Why did you make frozen piss at my house, again?
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
Randomize
