I think I'm going to be in trouble for sneaking out last night. My Dad saw me drive up this morning when he was leaving early for work.
What'd you say?
I told him I was sleep driving
Why would I want to inherit a sex machine used by my grandma?
Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
Randomize
